Amazon Trial Too: Wherein we make a choice!

(This game is from the nineties!)

 (We're going with newcomer.  I should be getting my computer back by Saturday.  Also, can't look at the opening sequence without crashing the game.  And Asshat McJaguarbutt doesn't get subtitles from what I remember.  SO, RIGHT INTO THE GAME!)

Goddamn that was trippy.  The mask just came to life and talked to me.  And, uh...

This isn't the ROM.

I... what?

...I honestly don't think you could get me more lost than I am right now.  Seriously, I was in Canada thirty seconds ago.  Also, those barrels are tripping me out.  Or maybe that's the acid.

 ...I thought she was my man.

...Dude, I don't even know where I'm going.  That's not much help to me.

...Joao is flexing at you.

Oh god he's one of those asshats.

...With that harpoon?  Neat.

And your gimmick is...?

 Hum.  That actually seems like a pretty good deal

Oh god.  I'm way too high for this.

(Choice time!)

Elena:  She knows good places to camp! that doesn't really help us that much.

Joao:  He is made out of Red Bull and never gets tired.  which is good, but not really the best.

Rosa:  She knows where the fish are!  Really helpful.  Although, kinda irrelevant because I almost never run out of fish.

Miguel:  He's a med student! Mother of god do we need meds.  Nobody likes dysentery.